ok so i NEED to be 105 by next friday. rite now im at 107-110 [it flucuates ALOT] so that wont be that hard because i have 5 days to get there so i decided to make a new plan for myself. eat 3 meals aday with 2 snacks and stay under 1000 cal. aday and no more than that!! its def. not gona be hard to stay under that tho cuz im used to eating around 500 cals. i made it this way tho so i dont binge. so i will post wat i eat for the next 5 days and update my weight daily = ]]] lets hope i will be 105 on friday!!


xox Lana

( New Hair Cut picssss )

ok so taday i guess is going pretty well. i mean i just woke up so idk. but i have gymnastics later so that will help burn off the calories. i also just got diet pills so im pretty happy about that. but im scared of taking the stacker 2s [i already have taken them] but i mean ur not even allowed to buy them if ur under 18 [at least from the store i got them from] and im only 13 so im nervous that they might like mess up my body. i really wana get down to 99 tho so i will do anything possible to get there.

stay strong

xox Lana

lots of ppl with EDs say they have pushed family and friends farther and farther out of there lives and for me i didnt think that was true but just a few minutes ago i had an argument with my mom that made me cry. she came up from the basement and tried to grab me to hug me but i didnt let her at first, but then i did. after about 5 mins. of us crying on each others shoulders she said "i didnt no that my daughter could cry." and every time i read that, think about it or even type that quote it makes me cry because i love my mother but i just relized how little she knows about what goes on in my life and i feel very sad and guilty about that.

stay strong

xox Lana

This post is for myself if i ever feel an urge to binge!!!:



REASONS TO NOT BINGE:

1. My stomach will expand 3 inches or more because i bloat so fast
2. After the fact u will feel so guilty that for the rest of your life all u will feel like doing is excersising
3. BUT u wont excersise cuz u feel so fat u can barley lift ur self off the sofa
4. All i will be doing is adding to my disgusting fat rolls
5. You know u wanna look like the other girls at school and fit into those jeans perfectly and even be able to ask for them in a smaller size but u cant do that if u eat
6. The taste of food doesnt even last in ur mouth so wats the point of even trying just a little taste of it
7. And since the taste doesnt last u will just keep horrding more food into ur mouth and then feel disgusting and full [and remeber feeling full SUX!!]
8. If u make it with out bingeing u will have more motavation to keep going on with your fast or w/e you maybe doing
9. U like comments but no one comments fat cows 
10. Which would you rather feel at the end of the day [miserable & fat] or [accomplished & skinny] 

hmmmmmmmmm................. #10 was a toughy NOT!!

if anyone other then myself reads this i wrote this in the middle of a binge and feel like absoult SHIT!!! trust me girls bingeing isnt worth it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

stay strong [unlike me]

xox Lana

Current Mood: pissed off